sex & relationships

Five things you’ll know if you’re the eldest

Being the eldest child comes with a lot of responsibilty and demands, whether you’re at the top of a stack of two siblings or 22. (It happens! Ever seen 23 Kids and Counting?)

You are the example.

If you got anything less than an A* in your A Levels, your parents were harping on about how your siblings were going to look up to you for their own exams. If you were found with a can in your hand, god help you for the lecture coming your way.

That meant they DID look to you

How many times do you remember going into a big huff because your little sister was wearing an almost identical dress to your one? Countless. In their eyes, you were a god amongst men, and anything you did they could do too. Regardless of the age gap.

Whats yours is mine!

Ok yeah we can’t ALL be playing with the same thing at the same time. But how many times have you seen your younger brothers playing foosball with your table? Our one saving grace is that if we’re playing Fifa, sometimes we can just “forget” to plug in the second console. And the oldest was always player one- it’s the rules.

Someone else to take the blame.

If your football accidentally hit off the new vase, you could always blame the baby for being clumsy and throwing their toys everywhere. That crayon drawing on the wall with my name on it? Definitely the work of a six month old infant. If your parents bought it, you were safe. If not, you could start planning your “running away” mission, which would take you as far as Grandma’s house.

You will always have a best friend.

You will still fight like animals, but when you’ve all reached a certain age, you’ll find yourselves less tearing each other’s hair out and more tearing off a slice of pizza on a girly catch up night. And who better to bring to a Premier league match than the fan who’s been with you since day one?