Tinderella is a weekly feature where Aoife Bennett tells us about her journey to finding love.
About two weeks into my Tinder journey, I first met Gavin. He was about a year older than I was, lived in the posh part of town, and he had a dog. What wasn’t to like? If that hadn’t won me over, then the fact he looked a little like Ben Affleck was definitely going to work in his favour.
We agreed to meet one night, have something to eat, and see how we got on together. Turned out, we got on quite well. Maybe a little TOO well.
I’m a believer in honesty. It’s one of my big killers in any kind of ship, be it friend or relation. Luckily for me, Gavin had honesty coming out his ears. Sometimes, it was the kind of honesty you just don’t bring out to play the first time you meet someone.
We met outside Dublin’s Trinity College (spot the Irish girl wha?) and went straight for a walk around town. Now, this is a lovely idea, and not one I’m completely averse to. But there was just one problem. I’d been in the office where I was doing an internship all day, skipped my lunch (which is very unlike me) to get an article finished on time, and when I haven’t eaten, I am no one’s friend.
I suggested to Gavin that maybe we could go catch a bit to eat. He laughed, sounding a little nervous. “Oh, yeah. I forget people need to eat sometimes.” Sorry what? Don’t you eat, too? Am I on a date with the Tin Man from The Wizard of Oz? Or Frankenstein?
Too much information
We settled on one of my favourite Italian chain restaurants, and while I ordered a massive plate of pasta (my not quite secret shame), he went for a grille chicken salad. (Not a usual choice for a boy)
When quizzed, Gavin pulled from his wallet a vast collection of pill packets. “This is for my anxiety, and depression. I’ve had a troubled few years.”
He then went on to describe, in a quite intimate and intricate detail, his tumultuous relationship with mental health since he’d been 15. “And with the amount I’m taking, I’ve lost my appetite.”
Now, like Gavin over here, I’ve had a bit of a rocky road with mental illness myself. But that wasn’t what made me feel a little iffy about him- nor would it anyone.
What scared me was his seeming aversion to eating. For a woman who prides herself on having two dinners most days, this was a serious deal breaker. How would we pig out on the couch with a Dominos if his appetite wasn’t as big as mine?
It may seem trivial, but for me it was enough. We did keep in touch for a few weeks, but it fizzled out naturally so my search continues.
Today’s Online Dating Overload comes as follows. Because who could refuse a Prince Charming like this…