I, along with many other women and men, am guilty of calling someone a slut, a whore or a slag. These are terribly derogatory terms, but I’d been conditioned to believe they were suitable.
The idea that it’s OK to call a woman a slut is because we live in an environment of double standards, where men are just ‘having fun’ but women are cheap and easy. The word slut means to describe a very promiscuous woman, but it’s thrown around like a basketball, with no real consideration of the impact.
Definition Inequalities
The word slut is very gender specific with vicious intent on insulting women and stripping them of any value. I’m sure I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve heard the term “man-slag”, and I’m not even aware of any technical terms for a promiscuous male. The reason for this is simple; women are not granted the same sexual freedom as men. This sexism is actually built into evolution. Women were expected to be picky about their sexual partners, because eggs are valuable and they want their partner to stick around. Men were supposed to chase as many sexual encounters as possible.
This age old psychology has transmitted itself into modern society, as we punish girls who enjoy casual sex and tease men who can’t get laid. The notion of slut-shaming is unfair and frankly ridiculous. The last time I checked, it took two to tango and definitely two to have sex. So how can we possibly treat the same behaviour differently, dependent on gender?
It all comes down to the view of promiscuous women not making good wives. This is laughable, because the same man who judges this young woman as not being marriage worthy is sleeping with everything that says yes, and not thinking twice about it. Women; be loyal, be funny, be beautiful, be sexy (but not too sexy). Men, do whatever the hell makes that little guy happy.
Now, I’m not attacking men. I’m attacking the twisted system within which we all function.
We are all, including females, guilty of holding women to a different standard to men, and believing that their amount of self-respect comes from how often they decide to close their legs. I had been in a four-year relationship, but am no better than any woman who has lived differently.
Slut is another way to oppress women, as if being intimate with a man gives people an excuse to devalue their opinion and control them.
If a woman wants to be in a committed relationship, that’s fine. If a woman wants to remain celibate until she finds someone special, that’s fine. If someone wants to sleep with every Tom, Dick and Harry, that’s fine too. Because, although it may have escaped our attention, it’s her own rightful choice, as long as it’s safe and protected.
Society Pressure
The ability to enjoy sex is a fantastic and valuable trait. A woman who is as laid back about sexual intercourse as men should not be scrutinised and frowned at by the public. By consistently associating sex as “bad” when it comes to women, we are continuing the stark and troublesome gender inequality.
Women, even women I know, worry about numbers, about the societal backlash that will come from heading into double figures. I even know someone who lies to her male partners about their sexual past, to appear more desirable. Whenever I muse over this, I think; do men suffer from this inner turmoil? Of course not. We live in a society where men and women have completely contrasting goals.
We cannot progress forward with feminism if we allow men the freedom of sexual expression but not their female counterparts.
No one can even decide to what extent you need to sleep around before you are a ‘slut’. So when you next sit down with your friends and talk about that girl whose been sleeping with ‘too many’ men, think about the men she’s sleeping with, and whether they suffer the same abuse.
I bet my life savings on him being celebrated for securing the bang.
