sex & relationships

Our guide on how to survive your first date

Turning up on the doorstep clutching a red rose in one hand and cinema tickets in the other is outdated and clichéd. Just don’t it, please. No.

Turning up on the doorstep clutching a red rose in one hand and cinema tickets in the other is outdated and clichéd. Just don’t it, please. No.

It’s a tricky business, navigating your way through a first date, but if you know what you’re doing you can sail through it. If you have had a string of bad first-timers, now is the time to take note of the following tips and sort things out.

Take charge
Take the lead and plan the first date. Girls love it when a guy puts effort in to spending time with them, it shows they care and want to impress. Make the decisions and be sure to have a back-up plan if things don’t go according to plan, she’ll be impressed and the date won’t go to waste. 

Avoid the obvious
The days of a first date at the cinema are over. End of. Do something where you can interact, talk and get to know one another, after all that is the point of going on a date. Try to strike an even balance between conversation and pleasant distraction. Be unique and be creative!

Make it personal.
Tailor the date to her interests. If she likes music then take her to a gig, if she loves walking suggest a stroll in the park and a picnic. Anyone can hash together the supposed failsafe ‘dinner and a movie,’ but a girl wants to see you’ve made the effort to consider her interests. Show her why you are special.

Keep it casual.
You don’t want to go all out on the first date—take time to build up to the romantic candlelit dinner. Suggest grabbing a coffee, an afternoon at the beach or a sports event (if she’s into that of course!). Or go for something a little more adrenaline-fuelled, such as laser tag, skating or a trip to the fair to brave those stomach-churning rides.

Forget the red roses.
Ok, so most girls do love a bunch of flowers, but don’t go too crazy on the first date. Try and find out what her favourite flower or colour is and choose a single stem accordingly. Even better, get her a little something which reflects her interests. Use your imagination and show her you thought about her whilst choosing something. Then again, don’t feel pressured to get anything; it’s not the be all and end all.

Be curious.
Be interested in your date. There’s nothing duller than an incessant monologue, and you won’t be getting date number two if you head down that route. It’s hard when you’re nervous, but make sure to ask questions and make it clear you want to get to know her.

Be chivalrous.
Try and pick her up, hold open doors and always offer to pay. It goes without saying you need to have manners, even if that doesn’t always come naturally. When you say goodbye, be a gentleman. Never go in for more than a kiss on the cheek. Take it one step at a time.

Relax. Don’t try too hard.
It may feel like the pressure is already on (well it is a bit, let’s be honest!) but try not to overthink everything. Just relax, be natural and be yourself. Nothing is a bigger turn off than a guy overcompensating and going overboard. Less is really more.

A first date is never an easy task, but being sincere, thoughtful and confident will go a long way to making it a success. Be creative, be interested and above all-be a gentleman.

What do you think? What is your advice on approaching a first date? Have your say in the comments section below, on Facebook or on Twitter.