sex & relationships

A guide to long-distance relationships

Written by BeckyLouLeeds

According to dating website Parship, 12 per cent of UK couples are in long distance relationships. With more and more couples meeting online, and the increasing ease with which they can keep in touch with their loved one, it’s hardly surprising that more than one in ten people commit to long distance love.

If you’ve found yourself as one of these 12 per cent, read on for my guide to making it work…


Use a variety of ways to keep in touch

Phone, text, video call, email, even the good old fashioned letter or postcard. Getting a hello in an unexpected way shows your partner that they’re in your thoughts if not their town.

Both try and make as much effort as each other with the travelling

It’s just not fair if one of you is doing all the running about to spend time together, and could lead to resentment.

Try the occasional surprise visit

This can help inject a little spontaneity to your relationship, which can be difficult when you normally plan visits with military precision! But liaise with a friend of your loved one to make sure they don’t have plans or deadlines that they can’t get out of.

Talk through any worries

When you don’t see your partner much, it can be tempting to put off talking about serious stuff in case it puts a dampener on a precious few days together, but this just leads to stuff building up and making it harder to fix.


Be afraid to say if it’s not working

Long distance relationships are tough. If you’re finding it too much, say so.

Forget that you and your partner have lives away from each other too

I felt that all my spare time was spent either travelling to see him, or looking after him while he was visiting me, in our own little bubble. Neglecting your friends and family is never a good thing.

Let jealousy or mistrust invade your brain

If you have a genuine concern, talk about it, but all that time away from each other can be a perfect breeding ground for insecurity. Try and keep some perspective.

Forget that train tickets are waaaay cheaper in advance!

By co-ordinating diaries and booking travel in advance, you’ll have more cash to do fun stuff with!

All pretty common sense tips, but when you’re in the midst of train tickets, late night phone calls and just plain missing him/her, it’s the little things that get lost.

Remember that relationships are supposed to be fun!  


If you missed last weeks guide, you can find Hannah Parry’s guide to dating at university here.